Tide of Emotion: A Reflection on Love and Loss

Apparently, I have denied or hidden many things from myself as well as from the world beyond me. In truth, perhaps, I am less than who I believed myself to be. However, all things being equal, I do love. Without question, and maybe to my detriment. I do, and God forgive me, I do feel. In retrospect, possibly a tad bit too much. I’m no fool. I recognize exactly who and what I am. And therein lies the problem: a realization that regardless of my attempts to hold back the rising tide… I am who I am. A reflection of those before me and a lost whisper of what could be. It’s the hurt that consumes me, and… I fear what becomes of it. I’m hurting, Mama! My grasp no longer holds the grip it once did. Know this: loving you is so fucking easy. It’s akin to wanting (needing) to breathe and knowing you represent the ability to inhale life itself. And there it is… my inability to see beyond the moment at hand—today… too consumed by the present. So let me formally apologize. I failed you from hello. But, and again, God forgive me, my dumb ass loved you…
MH ~